Can I share a secret with you? Before getting married to my husband, before I said yes to his proposal, before I even met him or started dating anyone at all — I had a fear that whatever marriage I entered into would fall apart. There isn’t too much of a reason for this….in fact, I think I can count the number of divorced members of my family and extended family on one hand. I say ‘I think’ because I actually don’t know my dad’s side all that well. But I have an enormous family so this is actually saying a lot.
You must be picturing a bunch of people who just don’t believe in divorce so they suffer through miserable marriages. I suppose I don’t truly know what’s going on behind closed doors for everyone but I haven’t gotten that vibe from many of them, and I think that’s a pretty easy vibe to give off if it’s where you’re at. Since I didn’t have a lot of exposure to divorce or unhappy marriages growing up, I’m not sure where my fear came from. I think maybe it stemmed from my old tendency to expect negative things for my life. Thankfully that tendency has become more minimal as time has gone on and I’ve grown to love my life.
Today’s prompt pertains to this subject:
Share a time when you had a glimpse at what happy marriages years down the road can look like.
I was actually in a chapel service for the memory that pops out to me. I knew the couple that my “glimpse” is of, though not very well — him more so than her. Actually I don’t think I can say I really knew her at all, though I do remember her name was Elizabeth. Tiny bit of acquaintanceship at best. Based on their age and the ages of their three kids, my best guess is that they’d been married for about 23 years. I don’t remember anything about the service that was going on, except that we were sitting in the very last row, on a bench against the back wall. He was sitting to her left and I to her right, though there may have been a couple other people between me and them.
He was wearing a t-shirt that had a quote with large font letters written on the back. As the speaker droned on about a subject I clearly wasn’t listening to, the husband was bent forward with his elbows leaning on his knees. His wife traced her finger softly over the phrase written on his shirt, letter by letter, taking her time with each word. I remember thinking that was so beautiful. You didn’t need to know them very well (I didn’t) to recognize the softness they had with each other. Not just in that moment, but other times I saw them around. It was like they had a quiet intimacy that was public appropriate. Not just public appropriate, but public beautiful.
I know this is a tiny story without much detail, but I have always remembered it fondly. To be married for more or less 23 years and still have such a close and strong bond is memorable and really very beautiful to me. Not many couples have it.
I hope to with my husband one day though. It might be easier for some couples to have and display it more often now where I’m at, with 2-3 years of marriage, but 23 years? That’s when you know the couple has worked hard to earn the beauty of what they exhibit.
Here’s some background music for while you share your own memory 🙂 Windrunner | One Hour Indie/Folk/Alternative Mix Feel free to respond to my prompt on your own blog and paste the link to it in my comments for others to read, or just write your story straight into the comments if you’d prefer! And don’t forget to like and follow me if you enjoy this kind of content and want to get more ❤